Comments on "Stop Saying You're Fine" by Mel Robbins

Stop Saying You're Fine by Mel Robbins

Discover a More Powerful You

I highly recommend this book as a great guide for refining your goals, accomplishing your goals and helping people who are stuck in life and don't really know what their goals are. Excerpts from the book follow.

Being stuck is the feeling that you are trapped by the life you have created is terrifying and infuriating. Deep down, you know you want something more, but maybe you don't know what it is or you simply don't have a clue how to get it.

If you can reclaim control over 5 percent of your life, and spend that time doing something productive, energy-inspiring, and action-oriented you will quickly restore order and balance to your life.

There's a battle going on in your brain, and it's keeping you from getting what you want. To win any fight you have to know what you are up against and how to fight back. Your brain is a formidable opponent and it fights dirty. At crucial moments throughout your day, your brain is putting the brakes on your desire for action and inserting thoughts and feelings in order to keep you from moving forward.

Your brain is constantly producing propaganda to project a false sense of your personal limits. Think of it as an overeager natural defense system that is designed to protect you from stepping into situations that involve too much risk. You need to develop tricks to outsmart your brain at its own game, by devising tricks that let you accomplish higher goals.

Admitting to yourself, let alone others, that you're stuck can feel monumentally difficult. Unless you are actively attacking your problems and impressing your friends through your efforts to fix things, frequent conversations about feeling stuck can be a major social downer.

It might seem that shrinking your dreams makes them easier or more manageable, but the truth is that when you shrink your dreams you kill them. The smaller version is not what you desire. It's a lie. The little thing is not what you want, the big one is."

The test of your goals and dreams

Test #1: Is it embarrassing?

Test #2 Is it selfish and a little crass?

Test #3 Is it specific and detailed?

What if I truly don't know what I want? You need to get out into the world and do something new and exciting and big. What you need is action, not thought. So stop thinking and just pick.

When you announce to other people what your dreams are, you enlist the outside world in holding you to your commitment. There are three simple reasons why you must do this. 1) you can't get anything done in life without the help of other people. 2) Other people accelerate your pace and broaden your ideas. 3) Your relationship with people is the most important aspect of your life.

Get people to help you. Describe your desire to them, then ask the following questions

1. If you were me, what specific things would you be doing to get started/learn more/etc.

2. Do you have any books that you would recommend I read?

3. Do you know anyone who come give me some more advice/counsel?

There's no faster way to accelerate this process of changing your life than to surround yourself with people who do the same thing that you are interested in. You cannot underestimate the power of proximity when it comes to forming connections.

The longer you wait to get started on your goals, the more you think and the more you lessen the impulse to take action.

Life will back you into a corner. The only way out is through. As soon as you see multiple ways to have what you want, you will push through. Remember to be like water. If something gets in your way, flow around it.

Action removes doubt. The moment you take stock of the situation and start actually doing something about it, you begin to feel better. You feel a sense of control returning to you.

Euology for Lindsa MacDonald

Eulogy given on Oct. 29 at Evangelical Presbyterian Church in Annapolis.

Presented by her husband, Chuck MacDonald

Lindsa MacDonald loved Jesus, her family and the St. Louis Cardinals. She had a zest for living and a love of life that was contagious. People wanted to be around her to absorb some of that vitality.

I recall when we lived in S. California, we would frequently invite a bunch of singles over to our house on a Friday evening. Lindsa would whip up a meal for 10: French market soup and cornbread was a favorite. We might even all go to a local high school football game. After people left we would get enthusiastic thank you's for days, saying what a great time they had. We would look at each other and say, "What did we do, that was so special?" Just being around her made things special.

She had insight and a quick tongue that cut through emotions and feelings to get to the heart of the matter. And if someone was not serious about their relationship with the Lord or their talents that God had given them, she was quick to let them know about it. If she detected bad doctrine or squishy ethics she would correct them in a hurry.

I remember many times seeing her wrestle with a decision about what God wanted her to do or a lesson He was trying to teach her. She would converse with the Lord about the situation, meditate on it a bit, then converse with the Lord a bit more. She would not give up until she understood what the Lord had for her. No slackers around her!

One of Lindsa's favorite things to do was acting. She returned to college focused on getting her degree. even though she was 38 at the time with three small children. It meant some late hours and difficult commitments, but she hung in there and worked alongside "kids" 15 years younger. She was in several stage plays along the way to getting her theater arts degree from Cal State San Bernardino.

Lindsa loved to use those dramatic skills to have an influence for the Lord. Through our church in Redlands, Calif. and later in St. Louis, she was able to act in numerous skits and full-scale dramatic performances that highlighted faith in Christ and the outworking of faith toward personal godliness.

The most memorable ones were "Good News Scrooge," a production that put a Christian twist on Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol," a dramatization of the life of Esther from the Bible, and a production called "Bethlehem Marketplace," that took visitors through the village of Bethlehem and confronted them personally with the claims of Christ.

One story that I remember from those days, showed how she used to get into situations, then see God get her out of them. We were living in St. Louis at the time and she flew back to California for a couple of weeks to be involved with "Bethlehem Marketplace" and was dressed in first-century garb guiding guests through the village. After a performance on a Friday night she was driving to the home of some friends where she was staying with. It was about 11:30 at night along a desolate stretch of road when the car conked out on her. Fortunately in California desolate and suburb are often in close proximity. This was before the days of cell phones and she wasn't even quite sure where she was. Incredibly an older couple was walking their dog across the wash from the street she was on. Lindsa (always the shy, retiring type) proceeded to ask for help and explain her outlandish clothes. The couple, instead of picking up their dog and running for their lives from this weird person, invited her into their house and let her use their phone. When nobody answered the phone, they volunteered to drive her (a person they just met 15 minutes ago) to where she needed to go. Lindsa tended to have that effect on people. When they got to where her friends house was they dropped her off and with a wave returned home. I can't even remember what happened to the car.

Fast forward a couple of decades to when she was in the last stages of her 4+ year battle with the insidious disease of cancer. She was in a lot of pain and the discomfort is hard to describe. Tough to watch a person that you love suffer. She woke up one morning and said with disappointment, "Why am I still here?"

She was ready to go to be with her Savior. To cast aside her worn out flesh and take on a new body, one capable of living forever and enjoying continuous fellowship with her master. She could say with Paul: "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith; in the future there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord the righteous judge will award to me on that day" 2 Timothy 4:8.

When you're married to a person for a long time -- we were married for 36 years -- there are times when we wish our spouse was different. More of this or more like that. But in the end, you can look back and see she was the perfect person for you. Praise God.

To close, let me leave with you a couple of enduring images of Lindsa:

Swimming a mile on her birthday. I used to call her the human torpedo in the water.

Going to the beach and riding the waves. Even in her 60's she loved the beach.

A cruise to Alaska to celebrate her 60th birthday. She loved it all, but especially playing with the dogs that compete in the Iditarod.

Her love of nicknames and catch phrases. When I was teasing her about something she might say, "Go bite the wall!" It always made me laugh when she said that.

She had pet names for people close to her: I was "The Dude!" Mark was "Tiger" Tracy was "The Munch" and Christy was "peanut" She used to call herself "Tomato face." because when she blushed (which was often in the earlier years of our marriage) she turned tomato red.

Her love for her new granddaughter Maggie Rose. Even in her final weeks, Lindsa would smile broadly when she heard Maggie's voice on the telephone.

Thanks for joining us today in celebrating Lindsa's life and legacy.

Lindsa Kay MacDonald
1949-2011

Lindsa Kay Johnson MacDonald, 62, died September 26 after battling colorectal cancer for more than four years. She is survived by her husband of 36 years Chuck MacDonald, of Bowie, Md.; her children Mark MacDonald of St. Charles, Mo., Tracy MacDonald of Bowie, Md., Christy MacDonald of Arlington, Va., and her granddaughter Maggie Rose MacDonald of St. Charles, Mo. Mrs. MacDonald's parents Bill and Virginia Johnson of New Martinsville, WV preceded her in death about 10 years ago.

Mrs. MacDonald was born July 6, 1949 in Morgantown, WV and graduated from high school in New Martinsville, WV. She decided to go back to college while she had three small children at home, graduating from California State University in San Bernardino, in 1992 with a degree in theater arts. She earned her way onto the Dean's List while there. For several years she assisted the drama programs at Parkway North High and Clayton Junior High in the St. Louis area. She designed and acquired costumes, supervised make up and assisted with staging of plays. She also coached drama students in Attleboro, Mass. She enjoyed the challenge of helping students develop their acting skills and shine at the productions.

She also acted in the plays "Good News Scrooge," "Esther" and "Bethlehem Marketplace," all Bible-centered productions performed in Redlands and Yucaipa, California during her 20 years in Southern California. She loved using her acting skills as a means to showcase her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Mrs. MacDonald worked for Campus Crusade for Christ for 20 years and for the Parkway and Clayton School Districts in administrative roles.

After moving to Bowie in 2003 her warm personality enabled her to develop many friendships in exercise classes, Bible studies and in the neighborhood. Mrs. MacDonald enjoyed exercising and regularly marked her birthday with a one-mile swim.

She was a member of the Osti Association of Anne Arundel County and a regular attendee at Evangelical Presbyterian Church of Annapolis. Her favorite Bible passages included John 15 and the story of Rahab in Genesis.

A memorial service will be held at Evangelical Presbyterian Church, 710 Ridgely Ave., Annapolis, MD on Saturday, October 29 at 2.

Donations can be sent to Hospice of the Chesapeake 8724 Jericho City Dr., Lanham, MD 20875

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